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The mention of negotiation generally brings fear to many—reminding people of previous heated ups and downs concerning conversations for business and personal reasons. Avoiding anger is essential for finding a solution to which all parties willingly agree. Accordingly, we need to reflect on whether our actions help to resolve issues or harm business growth and personal connections.

Most people are unaware that body language significantly impacts the outcomes. Moreover, our tone of voice encourages or discourages attempts to find an agreeable solution. Personal encounters are the trickiest to deal with in that other people we know will often be involved on the backend and connected with our friends, like it or not. 

Recently I received a call from someone I know who immediately began ranting and raving over a document I provided to another. He slammed the phone down without allowing me to explain why I did so. Ten minutes later, he called to apologize, but it wasn’t sincere, as he still did not want to hear my perspective. 

To enjoy negotiating, one must be open to hearing varying perspectives with explanations of ‘why’ to come to an agreeable conclusion.

At issue was my concern for another whose health is declining daily. One day we may each face the same. Planning is essential for self as well as for business. The essential piece is to work for the greater good. 

According to the angry person, I should have sat face-to-face with the person in question rather than put facts to paper. But he is the type who won't listen, particularly to a female. Once family members see the specifics, altering or omitting them will be non-negotiable. Moreover, citing potential harm to several others and himself requires professional help is inarguable. It needed to be spelled out for his family heirs to make essential decisions for forthcoming necessary care. 

Vindicated

One person continually helping the person in question is putting himself in jeopardy due to his unique health issues. Upon seeing the document, his spouse emailed to ask for my phone number and then called to thank me for having the courage to speak up out of necessity.

Childhood Training

‘Speak up for yourself or no one else will.’

Our values and priorities always need to be harmonious in all that we do. Exceptions do not work out well. And when someone attempts to play the ‘guilt strategy,’ it’s time to speak up for oneself and others involved. It is how you retain a good reputation and model leadership for those following in our footsteps.

Work for the Greater Good

Only some conversations will be pleasant, but the ones giving discomfort are typically necessary. Letting the other person begin the conversation to share their perspective is best. Like sales, ask questions about anything you do not understand and clarify your statements they do not fully comprehend. Most importantly – remain calm!

Upon hearing a question that may surprise you, inquire why the person is asking to direct a better answer. If you disagree, offer suggestions to find a solution agreeable to all. Sometimes, we must explain ourselves, including our beliefs and goals. Whether a sale or a personal disagreement, the outcome intent is to reach an acceptable agreement and move forward together.

The disturbance generally subsides upon people realizing that you seek an outcome beneficial for all. Only then will agreement occur. Clients and personal connections realizing that you are looking to work toward the greater good typically relent and will agree to move forward with you.

Sales Tips: Bring Negotiations to Successful Conclusions

1.   Keep a calm voice even when thrown back on your heels.

2.   Maintain a calm demeanor throughout and smile whenever possible.

3.   Attempt to explain the reasoning behind your thinking.

4.   Habitually inquire about the previous experiences of others and their takeaway lessons.

5.   Immediately attempt to connect the dots between your beliefs and theirs.

6.   Ask, 'What if?' to find a better route for all parties.

7.   Upon hearing a concern, ask questions until you realize a suitable conclusion.

8.   Take note of the positive possibilities that can coincide with your thinking to reach an agreement.

9.   Create a list of topics you agree on and consider hiring professionals to assist.

10.                 Celebrate Success!