The purpose for
filters on your car, vacuum, air conditioners and other appliances is to keep
the dirt out of the working parts of the machine. Without filters the
appliance will have a very short life, if it continues at all and the results
will be very costly.
The same is
absolute with our relationships. If we do not apply a language filter, we
will do severe damage with our communication and ruin our relationships.
Be it with yourself or others, the words we speak can be a fertilizer allowing
what lies underneath to blossom or will bury it. Our self-talk is the
best place to start.
The words we
choose are programs to our sub-conscious mind, which cannot differentiate
between negative and positive. Prove it to yourself: In the room
where you are now, look around the entire room and notice everything, but the
color red ….
Now what was the
first thing you noticed? Almost everyone will see everything red in the
room; they may try to ignore the red, because they remembered they were not
supposed to notice the red. So, we have learned that the mind will
respond to what we ask it, no matter if phrased in a negative or positive
light.
If we are
choosing to be embraced with more positive things in our life, we must take
action in choosing only the positive words that will bring us closer to
our dreams. I was reminded how powerful this can be when I had an
AD on a dating site, years ago. I had listed many positive attributes I
wanted in a relationship. And I did attract all those qualities with my
wife, Caryl.
However, I must
remind you to be very specific in your asking. One of the characteristics
I asked for was an accent. In my mind I was wishing for something soft
and lyrical to my ear (Southern, Aussie, British) . . . what I got was a
New York accent. I am grateful it is not a hard New York
accent. What we say does have a great power over ourselves and the people
in our lives. Choosing wisely what we say can only benefit everyone
involved.
"Sticks and stones may break our bones, but words will break
our hearts." – Robert Fulghum