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How Much Does it Cost to Not Get Help?

24 Aug 2018 | Posted Under Aging

Many of us, myself included, do not know how to ask for and get help.

But how much does it cost you to not ask for and then not get help that you need? My guest on this episode of The Little White Lie is Cat Williford. Cat is a Transformational Self-Development Coach, Speaker, and Author. She has appeared as a guest expert on many shows such The Maury Povich Show, and has been featured in the Los Angeles Times. She coaches individuals as well as national and international corporations.

As I always do, I asked Cat to share her Little White Lie with us.

“My little white lie,” she confesses, “is the lie I tell myself that I can still do the things I used to do when I was younger—like survive on five hours of sleep. The truth is I need six to seven hours of sleep these days or you just don’t want to be around me!”

It may sound simple or even funny, but I love her response. It relates so perfectly to our topic about asking for what you need! Many of us don’t ask for the help we need because we are afraid that it’s going to make us look or feel less than capable. Cat says that reluctance to ask for help will continue until the cost of not asking for help becomes too great.

“I hear three things from clients who come to me for help because, honestly, a lot of my clients are just like you and me with that reluctance.”


According to Cat, One (or more!) of these three things tends to happen when we don’t ask for the help we need:

We get sick, stop having fun, and stop moving forward!
I can attest to the truth of those! Just less than a year ago, I stopped having fun. I knew that I needed to ask for help of some kind to get back on track. I attended one of Cat’s events and started working with her soon after that to get the help I needed.

Cat works with her clients to change the rules of their inner game. These are all the inner beliefs and dialogues that set the subconscious and conscious masks we wear on the stage of our lives. These rules that we live by are not always to our benefit, and sometimes they need to be changed. I had to change some of my own inner dialogues and rules. And boy, am I glad I did!

I asked Cat to leave us with a piece of advice that you could implement today, and she gave this wisdom:

“Give yourself permission to be where you are on the journey, and to not have to have it be perfect. Be kind to yourself. Accept where you are. If you can’t quite love it yet, just be in acceptance of where it is, and maybe not judge it for just a little bit.”

Often, that’s the first step in asking for help. Accept that you need the help! We all need support of different types at different times in our lives. Ask for the help you need. The cost if you don’t can be so high. But the payoff when you do, can be a game-changer.

You can find Cat online at, on Facebook, and on Twitter.

Join her Facebook Group, The Sisterhood Circle Advantage, where she cultivates a safe space that is all about Love and being Vulnerable. Cat’s events are a great place to begin exploring the rules of your inner game and to begin uncovering some of the masks you may wear. Her next event is coming up in October, and I highly encourage you to attend if you are able to do so.

Let’s keep the conversation going! Join our Facebook group, The Little White Lie Network, and share. Remember to use the hashtag #LWL when sharing or commenting on social media so we can find you and participate!

Thanks for being part of the Little White Lie Movement!

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