When I toast the New Year,
I feel enthusiastic about what positive possibilities await me. I know the year
will be filled with accomplished goals as well as unexpected events that can be
uplifting or draining. Goals require that I plan and take action to
accomplish the results I want. The harsh surprises challenge me to accept
and allow in order to manage them successfully.
The biggest mistake I
think people make on their journey through life is to judge and resist what
happens through and to them. While you may have contributed to a negative outcome,
self-blame and forcing things to be your way prevent you from learning and
changing. Life events—loss of a job or relationship, health challenge,
financial setback, death of a loved one and more—interrupt your plans and may
even change your course. While these setbacks are stressful and painful, they
also offer an opportunity to evolve personally—physically, emotionally, mentally
and spiritually.
You react to trouble with
worry, sadness, helplessness, anger and/or guilt. This is natural. When you blame
yourself, others or life, you are wasting time and energy. You are resisting
what is and tirelessly swimming upstream instead of with the current. Negative
emotions and coping behaviors limit your ability to face yourself and make
choices that support you. They prevent you from moving on with ease and grace.
Some life events take
longer than others to accept, manage and resolve. However, if you are able to
maintain a level of non-attachment and positive attitude while doing your best,
you are on your way to surviving, thriving and making the most of each New Year.
Here are a few tips to
help you flow with, instead of resist, what 2015 holds for you:
Accept
instead of judge – Self: If there is something you want to
change about yourself, do it with compassion, never making yourself wrong. Others: Instead of trying to change people,
accept them for who they are, including their limitations. Situations: When a disruptive event happens in your life, do not
judge it as good or bad. Instead, be aware of what is happening and how you
feel. (You are not a failure or being punished.) Acceptance leads to clarity
and appropriate, empowering actions.
Allow
instead of resist – How
would you live your life if you believed that a Higher Power is working with
you and you could not make a mistake? I hope you would open your hands and
heart rather than close them in the midst of a disappointment or crisis. When you
understand how to go with the flow, you will be guided to a positive
destination and receive the support you need to get there.
Take
charge of what is within your power to change – Remind yourself that in any given moment in time you are
doing your best—even if it feels like you are missing the mark. Without
judgments you are more likely to make changes and take actions that empower
you, improve your relationships, accomplish your goals and bring meaning into
your life.
Focus
on the positive –
Instead of dwelling on the problem, focus on a solution that will work for you;
it might even work for others. Positive thinking lifts you out of a limiting
past and promotes an abundant future. By focusing on a positive outcome in the
present, you heal the past and change your future because positive thoughts and
feelings generate the kind of energy that fuels your vision.
You hear a lot about
setting your intentions and making plans to accomplish goals at the beginning
of a New Year. Are you prepared to cope with the unexpected? These few
strategies will bring more ease into your body, mind, soul and life because
accepting and allowing are as important as planning and doing. I encourage you
to face yourself and your life with more acceptance and flow. You will turn any
adversity into a stepping stone toward greater aliveness and serenity.